Pregnancy Mind Games

When you plan on starting a family and wanting to get pregnant, there’s a different kind of rush that you feel when you see the word “pregnant” appear on a tiny little stick.  Let the mind games begin!

For both of my pregnancies, I was in denial that being pregnant was a result of my body acting differently.  When I took a few at-home pregnancy tests and waited for the results, the minutes of waiting were the longest ever.  The anticipation was eating me inside.  And once the reveal came out to be positive, I felt my head shift into a gear that I’ve never felt before.

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First Response Test taken October 1, 2015

During the first couple of days after I found out I was pregnant with baby #2, I was convinced my mind was playing tricks on me.  My body started aching in places where it never ached before, I suddenly needed to rest and nap every day after work and my appetite changed where all I could drink was carbonated water.  I immediately thought my internals were making waves and moving around to make space for my little baby.  It felt surreal, yet new for me that I was going through another pregnancy because I don’t remember feeling the same way during my first pregnancy.  So besides taking a pregnancy stick, what triggered the idea of being pregnant?  The answer is – wait for it – constipation.  Yup, I was constipated for an entire week and my husband said “go buy medicine or take a pregnancy test”.  Lo and behold, he was right…

After getting the official news from the doctor and finding out how far along I was, my body started playing more tricks to make me feel uncomfortable towards the end of my first trimester.  Constipation, more changes to my appetite, tiredness, sex urges, diarrhea, vomiting, sensitivity in the milk making region- you name it.  I went through a not so pretty cycle of figuring out what my body was doing.  It felt like my body knew what to do but my brain couldn’t follow along.  My first trimester has past (thank goodness) and I’m embracing every change my body is doing during my second trimester.  I rub my growing belly every minute of the day, I’m grateful for my regulatory bowl movements and I love my growing boobies (my husband can attest  to this).  So for now, I’m in a better place with all these pregnancy symptoms.  I’ll still get the occasional hiccup of a pregnancy side effect, but I’m hoping for a smooth sailing until I start having to take hydroxyprogesterone shots (more on that when I go through my first treatment).

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